I can still see you walking through the door,

tired and weary from a long day's work.

The smell of metal dust lingering on your clothes.

Your face dusty, your quick smile and laughing eyes.

I'd run through the house, proclaiming

"Daddy's Home! Daddy's Home!".

Some how I never felt the day was quite complete

until daddy was home,

Bringing with him security and contentment.

One day, Daddy didn't come home.

Mom tried to explain,

but somehow I didn't understand,

and was quite convinced it was me he didn't love anymore.

I tried real hard to be extra good,

and do everything right so daddy would come home.

He never did.

Twenty years came and went.

Somewhere along the years,

a little girl grew into a woman.

A woman who very much loved and missed her daddy.

For years I struggled with why and how.

How could he leave me like that?

Why would he leave me like that?

Did he love me?

Did he know I loved him?

How I longed to have my daddy back.

As destiny would have it,

a little girl and her daddy were once again to be reunited.

Finally all the questions could be asked.

I was prepared for anything,

because I knew not knowing was so much more painful than the truth could ever be.

Or so I thought.

I was not prepared for the love and respect I received.

I was not prepared to be so forgiving and understanding.

I wasn't prepared for this!

As I approached him, he looked so much older than I had remembered.

The years of pain showed in his face.

He loved me,

and he missed me,

and he asked me why I left him.

I was not prepared with an answer.

After a few minutes, all the years of disappointment,

pain and heartache,

all the tears, the lonliness, the emptiness,

it didn't matter.

Daddy was finally home!

Finally, the little girl could be a woman.

Now, daddy's going away again.

This time there is no return trip.

There will be no more hope,

no more dreams,

no more moments

to share a laugh or a warm hug.

No more time to say I love you.

No more time. All that remains now are memories.

The memories of a little girl and her daddy.

A woman and her father.

And a big empty space where daddy once lived.

November 1996
Toni Medeiros Craig

© 1997 Bewitch821@aol.com

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